It has been six months since I left
Portugal and I don't know what to feel. I look back and see the
common thread that led me to this moment. Inside I'm torn between how
much I've changed, and how much is going to change.
The question mark and exclamation
continue to guide my life. A child's amazement I insist not to leave.
My emotional yo-yo is also continuing, and I don't run away of my
sorrows. The void exists, but I understand that it gives us space to
fill in something.
The way I feel the trip has changed.
Today the world is also my world and it changes everything around me.
I don't look for the exotic but for the beauty. Wherever it may be. I
try to feel the emotions of where I am. Recognizing that it will be
more mine than of the places.
I don't know if I'm more adult or
childish. I would say both. I learned to live with this duality. Ever
present in me. I am often something and its opposite. Gradually
abandoning the prison of being and transform me into what I was.
The journey follows its path. Never
know where to go. I depend on what my "inner self" tells
me. I hear that voice more clearly, though sometimes still I don't
follow at the first word.
And, despite the time travel, I feel
that I have not seen, done or learned anything. There is so much
around me. So many experiences that go beyond me and make me humble.
Today I am more ignorant than before, even of myself. I found that I
have a long unknown road ahead of me.
And this is what the trip gave me in
these six months. But most of all, I met many fantastic people that
luckly crossed my path and that I learned to call friends. Unique and
special lives. So special that make me be sure that I am, and perhaps
always will be, a Lucky Bastard!
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