I walked slowly. A step at a time. Each one more secure than the one before. I know that this moment was coming. And just as I left India, every cell of my body said: “It's now!”
All this time I escaped myself. I knew that understanding of myself was superficial. Inside me there was a part that has always been well protected. It was too strong. I never felt the courage to face it.
When I had my first appointment with a psychiatrist, he told me that it wasn't the time to face the crocodile (or put in another way, of doing therapy with a psychologist). It was time to create the weapons before facing him. I've always loved this image. And symbolized what was inside of me. So years passed, depression came and a life-changing experience before I could face my crocodile.
Now the waiting time expired. While starting another leg of this trip, also my inner journey was going to another destination. A deeper and stronger one. It was time to confront myself. Take up my weapons and remove surgically the part of the Self that wasn't mine. Accept what is and free myself from my shackles. I don't do it lightly. Everything in me tremble to think what I am doing. The same one that smiles while imagining what is to come...
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